2 years later..

MAN ! Just noticed that I have abandoned my lovely and memorable blog for 2 years now.
Gosh, I had so much to update but with less or no time to do it. 2 years apart from my last post, I have graduated from my formal secondary school and have continued my studies further into Traditional Chinese Medicine, YES, you heard me, Traditional Chinese Medicine ! haha.

Having to remember when I first had this calling from God to study this course, I told people around me with a beatific smile and they all gave me a befuddled look as if I've done something boisterous. Why? Because it was so rare for someone to have chosen this subject at that time but I was clear and determined with my calling.

My KL friends all gave me the very pitiful looks when they knew my decision was firm and mind was set. They all thought as if I was going to die there ( because it is kind of boring here compared to KL and dangerous to them) but it didn't affect my hyper mood though. I knew what God planned for me at this moment, JB.

My Calling -
I started praying for my Uni and College since I was in form 4 or even earlier, I was wandering through all the courses that any Uni and Colleges would offer, friends gather together and go for trips （ to the education fair ) to find out what we're interested and where would we want to pursue our studies.
Like every teenager, I always wanted to go overseas ( if I had the chance ) so I went for a TAIWAN edu fair as well where I found something special, TCM, following that I noticed that I was interested in this particular course than any other like pharmacy or western medicine whereas I expected myself being interested in. I started to pray further into it, I put all my hopes in God and may He lead the way, guess what? He made a way =D 
I started seeing TCM all over the Sin Chew daily paper, I thought it was very nice and I sensed that God was leading me but at that time in 2011 there was no college or Uni here in Malaysia that offered this course which means I'll have to go overseas in order to take up this course. But I prayed instead of going all concerned about it. AMAZING as it seems to be, I flip through the newspaper the following day finding one Uni have just been approved to offer this course in English in Malaysia. I continued to pray ( because I thought it was expensive and I still had some interest in SEEING the world outside ) about whether should I stay or leave my country, to confirm, I told God : " Let another Uni open this course and I'll know this is the course you want me to study please? "
2nd day, DANG DANG DANG DANG, I found that the paper announced on the FRONT PAGE that another Uni have established this course, GREAT =D
Well, till this point you might think I'll just consider these 2 Uni right? You're wrong, I am a very unsecured person in this way and would want to further make sure my calling, the last one I said, God please open another one and I'll know where to go, please make it cheap, speaks in Chinese as I personally think that TCM should be taught in Chinese; God, let me serve you at the place where you want me to go as well. 
There it goes on the 3rd day, Southern College. 
With courage, excitement and of course some homesick, I went to JB to further my study.

Yes, from the first day till this day 2013, I have been asked Where are you from? After I answered KL, FOR SURE 100%, the question WHAT?! WHY are you here? Don't you have alot of schools in KL? hahaha. I've been like answering this questions over billions of times. Yes they are many schools in KL, that has TCM couses but I thought this was a nice place to study this course. This is the answer for non believers and I knew it was hard for them to understand the upper version of answer which is - THE CALLING.

The faces they portray whenever they know I'm from KL makes me want to laugh, it's as if they were beguiled by where I came from. But seriously, we are from the same country, just different states =)

And so my Journey here begins after I've arrived in JB...

A Brand New Year

It's a brand new year !
A new start !
I want to praise the lord in the starting of this year ! HALLELUJAH ! =D
He is just so wonderful.
He showed such mercy and so much love , 2011 started out with His deep deep love pouring down on me ^^
It started with having the chance to go to disciple training.
He SERIOUSLY knew what's best for me and what I needed.
Then, throughout this training , I once felt a little cold and abandoned as my church mates have not been in contact with me since the day I left.
But He never fails to comfort me with His special ways by showing me how beautiful the world is , how beautiful His creations were.
He taught me how to appreciate more and love others with all you have.
He gave me strength and wisdom to see the needs of others . He blessed me with these eyes to see the pain others are going through.
God also held my hands tightly and show me the way to help others.
He moved my legs to walk the path that is Right for me.
Lord knew how much I like to praise him with my voice.
He gave me a present, a gift that I treasure so much, that is the gift of having voice that sings his praises.
What else should I ask for other than to glorify him?
How could i ever repay His almighty love and grace?
I could only pray that in everything I do, everything I say glorifies him and brings joy to him.
May I use his blessings to bless more people.
May I use the blessings he gave me to help others.
Lord, I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH !
2011 Here I come !

Shutting down

I tried my best .
That's all I can give.
I feel so disappointed when I heard what X had to say.
Was that all?
I know I shouldn't expect so much, I'm not as good as V either.
All I wanted was to crush the wall between us.
I know you dislike me maybe you even hate me, that's why I tried my best to change what was wrong with me.
But I give up now.
I know there is nothing more I can do anymore.
I'm really tried, I tried so hard, I just can't do it, I'm so sorry.
I don't understand why am I shedding tears for this in the middle of the night, but maybe this is what you're worth .
Thanks for everything.
God bless you.